Supplement Me

Ah nutrition.  What do the pros eat?  What is the secret?  Were you really just born that superior or is there some magic concoction that has your engine working on mean machine?

I always thought supplements were gimmicks designed with the sole purpose of peddling hopeful elixirs at the expense of peon’s dreams like mine.  I wanna be like Mike!  To legit to quit?  Give me a sip!  Pro cyclists used to fill up on flat Coke and is the banana not the world’s most perfect food?  Where do I begin in the selection amongst the shiny cans and powdered formulas promising me a more optimal system?

The former-cyclist-me once invested in tubs of Cytomax.  Perhaps they have come a long way in taste, I would not know because that protein was not one that I could palate no matter how much more efficiently I wanted to pedal.  Gag me with a sirloin, it had the aftertaste of death.  I rewarded skinny McPhee with my leftovers and went back to Coke.

Recently, I have gotten into Vitamins.  I never used to take anything other than calcium (gals build your bones, (that there was the maiden me), but now all the kids multi-vitamins come in Gummi Bears and Sparkley Sugar Fish and calcium is chewy chocolate!  Bring on the vitamins!  I stick B12 under my tongue, eat my fruits and vegetables, and have animal protein daily.  But I am *tired.

*Tired as defined as some cause other than two children under 3 1/2 who awake me nightly to protect them from sharks and dinosaurs in their room and rise before the sun at 4:30am everyday.  This above mentioned tired is an ode to coffee.  Your welcome Don.

Fatigue. Lead. Glue. Blah.  Instead of Peppy Priscilla who never sits down, Sedated Sara is looking forward to The Pillow Diaries.  Diagnosis?  Over training.  Shhhh do not even say it.  Irritable?  Me? Never!  Just do not ask around.  Fatigue.  Trouble sleeping.  Change in appetite.  Those are the same symptoms for being a MOTHER!  Medicaid my Koolaid, you can fit any diagnosis out there if you read the fine print long enough.

I am amused at how we have a knack for selective hearing.  “Hon, take out the trash.  Hon, Hon?  The trash?  REMOVE IT.”  Am I speaking? Not about that listening lack, but about preferential cherry picking of piece meal scientific information. 

Example:  Gillian reads that NutraSweet causes cancer in some laboratory animals.  She taps her fingers on her diet drink and scoffs, “Oh they’re just rats.”  Newsflash: Blueberries are shown to have anti-aging effects in laboratory animals.  Gillian buys the farm.

Same rat.  New trap.

But…athletes seem to supplement.  They claim there is a difference.  Even if the change is subjective, the power of placebo is not to be under estimated.  If it works to you, it works.  I ask around at the gym.

“YOU don’t supplement!” she says between sit-ups.  “Of all people, I would think you would!”

I mean, I drink coffee in the morning and wine at night.  These uppers and downers apparently do not meet athletic expectation.  My friend suggests I try a two week sample of FRS.  I have tried a can or two before and it is tasty.  No, seriously, it actually tastes good.  My kids would drink it, but then if it worked on them, I would die.  Consequently,they will have none of it!

I ordered a two week free sample on line.  Well, here is to experiments.  Cheers!

~ by drea on February 27, 2009.