It Is Just Pee

This is written under the influence of a very full bladder.  I have to pee.  For one day, I am blissfully trapped in an office finishing up some work, but I have to pee.  My green water bottle is empty.  My Diet Coke has about an inch of slurp in the bottom.  I know, it is bad for you.  The DC not the pee-pee.  Although, you should not drink either.

Tap, tap, tap goes my feet.  I cannot get up to go because the bathroom door is locked.  Coffee shop.  There is one downstairs.  I can make it.  Sip.  Why am I continuing to drink?  I’ll be back.

Ah relief.

Potty training.  My kids are having none of it and who is to blame them.  Gotta pee?  Go ahead.  Change them later.  It is on their time and they never miss the action.  My first marathon I waited impatiently outside a port-o-pot for five minutes.  I did not know.  I did not know yet what runners really do.

The Circle of Friends 10K in NYC found me lining up behind semi-elite and ultra-elite females.  Got to go?  What is a girl to do?  I was aghast to watch these ladies crouch and piss on the streets of Manhattan.  Wow.  We can do that?  Sure, why not?  Lou Reed would be proud.

When you got to go, you got to go!  But, OK, here is when I drop the OBGYN red flag and men you can continue or not.  I warned you.  What about when you do not have to pee persay, but….but….argh.  The miracle of childbirth is something of a wonder and a bit of a Dependable wrecking ball of joy.  “Do your Keegals.”  It has been almost two years since my last baby.  I think Keegal forgot me.  “Oh, then join the club.”

We sneeze.  Yep.  We laugh. Yep.  Sometimes we, I mean I do not know who, are told funny jokes by store clerks and we must excuse ourselves with a jacket wrapped around the waste.  And so it goes that running is just sometimes…well….how shall I say?  WetN’Wild.

“Isn’t it amazing that WE made them?” he gazes lovingly at our children.  “I mean, there they are growing.  Sometimes I can’t believe it.”

“Um, yep.  Amazing, but I believe it.  Excuse me.”

~ by drea on March 27, 2009.