Put The Cake Where Your Mouth Is….
- Critical CupCake Critic
Dwayne, Amber, Serene, & Jasper Izzle were patrons of local cupcake artistes to determine Santa Barbara’s choice cake in a cup. The Izzles, well renowned in New Jersey for impossible to please palates, strike fear into the batter of unbridled bakers.
Best known for classic cake literature as “What The Cake?”, “Fake This Cake,” and the New York Times best seller “Cake That,” it is said that the Izzle children make Martha S. want to go back to jail without passing go.
Critically speaking, Izzle comments carefully capture the cake. For shizzle. Masters of disguise, the Izzles went incognito to fool these local houses of cake into thinking they were just another everyday family visiting from New Jersey. Loaded with as many identities as taste buds, Jasper [pictured above] finds solace dressed as a 4 year old Caucasian male. Not an easy task for a 27 year old NBA player from the south side of the Bronx.
Cupcakes were ranked on seven categories not answered in question form: Look, Selection, Frosting, Cake, Staff, Price & Fun Factor. For control, chocolate cupcakes were consumed at each stop as well as one variety full of fun-to-be-determine-if-fabulous flavor. Shops shell shocked are listed below with comments by our cake-dified connesuiours. Enjoy the tasting notes.
Crush Cakes
“Creamy chocolate forward frosting lingers longingly on palate. Cuttable cake evokes desert memories. Looking for milk, a fun frill free atmosphere pops with peace. Red Velvet classically folds under Amber’s wave of grain. Smokey, cake forward appeal, whiff of spice and everything nice.”
$3.00 per cake.
Dwayne says: Decent. Amber says: Decadent. Serene says: Dry. Alec says: Mumonouanmmm.
Whodidily
“Bold, frilly, satin long dress chocolate rich in moisture like an afternoon purple rain. Vivacious variety mixed in dizzying circus music sprinkled with Wonka wonder. Not a man’s cake, men can take this cake that women won’t fake. Ahh-ahhh-ahhhhhh-oooh so good. Galactic spot hit, no lactose needed. Marshmallow buttercream clouds showered in easter-ed coconut conjures childhood memories of microwaving peeps. Who-da- Whodidily mixes Monkey Love on a Sunday Stroll.”
$3.50 per cake.
Dwayne says: Dynamite. Amber says: Divine. Serene says: Deistic. Tyrone says: Ambrosial and Daoummmemmm.
Jeannines
“Modest selection captured behind uninviting glass surrounded by customers consuming omelettes.” The Izzles did not even try them.
Sprinkled Pink
“Who-done-it? In the parlor with the cupcake twas Cornell Captain Cake. What a fake out! Sprinkled Pink is WHODIDILY! Were we Wonka’d?”
Lazy Acres
“Lazy flavors push no mess chocolate and flower topped cream cheese vanilla. Served cold aged seventeen hours, these cakes please the senses as well as the wallet. Bigger bang for the buck and the salomni sample comes free.”
$1.99 per cake
Dwayne says: Dough. Amber says: Indulgent. Serene says: Thumbs up. Garret says: Grougnnoehmmmmm.
Pull up a Cake and Enjoy the Show.
Hee Hee! I am in on the next tasting! Recommend Fresco’s chocolate mousse cupcake.
Kary said this on May 3, 2010 at 10:46 pm |
We wanted to hit there, but after three tastings the headache had set in. We think we should sample Fro-Yo next as well.
Drea said this on May 3, 2010 at 11:04 pm |
Ooooh, a Fro-Yo tour? Can I come????
A Slice of Wife said this on May 4, 2010 at 2:24 am
Yo-fro-know it! I mean, we need experts!
Drea said this on May 4, 2010 at 2:39 am